Father’s Day lands on Sunday the 6th of September this year, and you already know exactly how the morning plays out. Dad unwraps another mug, a pair of jocks, maybe a set of tongs for the barbecue he already owns three of, or whatever else the kids picked out this year. He smiles, says it’s exactly what he wanted, and gets on with the day. Everyone plays their part perfectly every single year.
Back in my building days, I copped more “World’s Best Tradie” mugs and branded stubby holders than any bloke could use in a lifetime, and I was grateful every time because it really is the thought that counts. But if you could climb inside a dad’s head for five minutes on Father’s Day morning, his actual wish list would look a fair bit different to what ends up under the wrapping paper.
That is sort of the deal with being a dad. You spend the year sorting everyone else’s problems, and when someone finally asks what you actually want, “I’m right, mate” comes out automatically. Doesn’t mean it’s true.
If Only They Could Read His Mind
Father’s Day gifts tend to follow a familiar script: grooming products, tech gear, the usual food and drink. Solid stuff, and Dad will absolutely say thanks. None of it is what is actually rattling around in his head while he nods along and admires the golf socks.
Nobody is putting “prostate massager” on a wish list they hand to their eight-year-old. That does not mean it is not on the real one, the one he keeps to himself.
What’s Actually On His Wish List?
Here is what tends to be on it, even if he would never say so out loud, and definitely not in front of the kids.
- A bit of proper solo time: He is not bringing up wanting a decent masturbator at the family barbecue, but a good one turns an average night in into something worth looking forward to. Have a look through the masturbators range for a starting point.
- A bit more control: No bloke casually mentions wanting to last longer over breakfast, but a cock ring quietly sorts that out without any fuss involved.
- Something he has always wondered about: Prostate play does not come up in polite conversation, but plenty of blokes are curious enough to want to give it a proper go. A beginner-friendly prostate massager is the low-drama way in.
- The unglamorous essential: Nobody puts lube on their wish list, but every bloke chasing any of the above needs a decent bottle of water-based lube sitting right next to it.
- Effortless, hands-free fun: If he leans tech-curious, the Masturs AR strokers do the work for him, which is about as close as a toy gets to a long weekend.
None of it needs to be a big production either. Most of what is on that list fits in a drawer and does not require anyone else to know it is there.
Why Wait for Someone Else to Get It Right?
Here is the thing about wish lists. Nobody reads minds, not the kids, and not always a partner either, even one who knows you well. Father’s Day is one of the only days on the calendar where putting yourself first is not just allowed, it is basically the whole point of the day.
So, skip the queue of polite, predictable gift giving and just buy the thing you have actually been wanting. ClubX ships every order in plain packaging, so the only person who needs to know what is in the box is you.
Before You Hit Add to Cart
A few things worth knowing before you go.
- Keep it body safe: Stick to proper silicone from a retailer that actually stands behind what it sells, not a random overseas listing with no brand attached.
- Grab the extras while you are there: A bottle of water-based lube and some proper toy cleaner turn a toy into a purchase you will actually keep using, not one that gets forgotten in a drawer.
- Do not go too big on the first crack: Bigger is not automatically better, and a beginner-friendly size gets used a lot more than one that sits there out of intimidation.
Once you have got the basics sorted, the guide to creative masturbation techniques for men is worth a read for a few ideas on what to actually do with it.
Final Thoughts
Let the family have their fun with the mugs and the socks. That is part of the tradition too, and there is no reason to knock it, especially when a kid picked it out themselves. Just do not let it be the only thing you unwrap this Father’s Day.
Have a squiz at ClubX before the 6th of September rolls around and get yourself the thing that was actually on your mind.
