Valentine’s Day

Sexpert Opinion

Valentine’s Day can mean much more than flowers and chocolates

The big day of romance is fast approaching. The day where the supermarket aisles are filled with teddy bears, chocolates and just a whole lot of red, and there are queues spilling out of florists all over the country.

A lot of people take issue with Valentine’s Day — whether they be singles who feel isolated by a day seemingly geared so much towards couples, or by people who resent the idea that we must select a day to show our true romantic feelings to one another.

It may have become a day driven by commercial interests — although, I like that florists get a good run on this day; let them have their annual cash injection — but the problem also surrounds some misconceptions about the big day.

First of all, Valentine’s Day is supposed to be the day when we express ourselves and share our feelings with another person. When I was single, I’d see this as an opportunity to put my heart on the line knowing I had a bit of a get out of jail free card. All other days, our decision to share such feelings runs the risk of rejection, and thus we look for cues and signs that the other person may share the same feelings that we do, so that we are not made to look like a fool. But on Valentines Day, that’s not necessary. You have the perfect excuse — it’s Valentine’s Day, everyone acts crazy on Valentine’s Day. It’s a day that makes us do things that we wouldn’t normally do, and that is well understood after all. Let it build your courage. It’s a day to be reckless. Throw caution to the wind. Tell a person how you feel and if you get shot down, blame it on Valentine’s Day.

For couples, yes, you should be telling your loved one how you feel on a daily basis. You should also be arranging many a romantic evening, right throughout the year. So what should Valentine’s Day mean for you, then? For those who say that it exists because we tend to take for granted our relationships all year round, and thus Valentine’s Day is the day where we have to be a romantic again, is a pretty shitty excuse and I don’t buy it. If Valentine’s Day is forcing you to take your partner out for dinner, then clearly that relationship doesn’t feature high on your priority list. This being the case, what other purpose can it serve?

The answer is, for those of us already in a relationship, Valentine’s Day is the perfect time to take some risks, and kick our romantic adventurousness up a gear. With passion already in the air — not to mention a bit of the summer warmth and the sultry nights — it’s a good time to take some risks sexually in your relationship. It’s a time when, in the romance stakes at least, we may be able to tell our partners about that little piece of activity in the bedroom that we may have always wanted to bring up, but have never had the courage to.

Not only are our partners likely to be more receptive, especially when we’ve wined and dined them, but we ourselves should also be more open-minded on Valentine’s Day to fulfill some of the strange and wild fantasies of our partners.

Is it time to invest in some sexy or crazy costumes? Are there any particular romantic and/or sexual games that might help facilitate the wild fantasies that you have in mind? Maybe there are some bedroom toys that you’ve always wanted your partner to help pleasure you with.

This is the time. Make it count. It could lead to a whole year of fantastic pleasure, incorporating some of the fantasies that have been on your mind for years. All you have to do is seize the passion and the romance that Valentine’s Day can bring.  

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